UhhYeahDude

UYD

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Episode 362

Strokes of genius.

Complimenting Jonathan's hair, Michael Jordon, becoming Adam Levine, Mark Wahlberg Water, stroking is genius, USA Today Snapshots, harv those lungs, hair salon word play, peppering in movie quotes, C. Everett Koop's Obituary, Pedoscopes, putting inmates to work, UYD behind bars, barrel forward/scream back, National Flour Month, Bon Jovi's "'sup Now?", Ask Jonathan, sleep texting, UYD's Cancelled Cop Show of the Week, 3 Doors Down from State Fair, shitty showers, black box event data recorders, polluting backyard grills, in demand quinoa, Wicked Single, and Happy Hawaiians vs The Herda Hadda. Just be cool and get your act together.

UYD: Hard water, soft pressure.

Length

1:13:42

Intro

5 Days // inc. // no world

Outro

seventeen // inc. // no world

Seatbelts

1:10:04

UYD Slogans

4:38 – UYD: Priceless poster. Soft on market. 54:55 – UYD: Hard water. Soft pressure. 1:06:05 – UYD: Left for Hawaii, Right for New York.

TV Picks

15:24 – Jonathan watched an episode of Millionaire Matchmaker. He hadn’t dipped it in a while but he is a fan. There was a dude on the show who reminded him of something he did in adolescence – when somebody is a movie nut, and every single thing anybody says within a conversation becomes a reference to a movie and then a brief impression. This guy peppered in a few during the course of an episode. Jonathan thinks it’s the only way they can actually relate to what is going on in real life. 42:29 – While there are quite a few medical shows on TV now, there are also 24 cop-related shows: Beauty and the Beast on the CW, Bones on Fox, Burn Notice on USA, Castle on ABC, Covert Affairs on USA, Criminal Minds on CBS, CSI Season 13 on CBS, CSI: NY just ended this season, CSI: Miami was put on hiatus for NYC 22 – they both got canceled, Dexter on Showtime, The Glades on A&E, Grimm on NBC (a police procedural fantasy drama), Hawaii Five-O, Justified, Law & Order SVU, Major Crimes on TNT, The Mentalist, NCIS, NCIS: Los Angeles, Person of Interest, Psych, Rizzoli and Isles on TNT, Southland, Unforgettable on CBS, Warehouse 13 on SyFy, and White Collar starring friend of the show Willie Garson. 1:00:13 – We’ve got Boston’s Finest on TNT, which is good, but now we’re getting real authentic with Wicked Single. This premieres on St. Patrick’s Day, March 17, on VH1. “Work hahd, and play hahd. Wicked single.” Six Bostonians in their 20s and 30s are looking for answers to that age-old question – how can they grow up without growing old?

Product of the Week

4:43 – Adam Levine has launched a new clothing line, called “2-2-2 – Becoming Adam Levine,” available at Kmart.

Obituary of the Week

18:25 – Seth read C. Everett Koop’s obituary. Within the obituary, it mentioned that before he became the surgeon general he eliminated something that existed in the U.S. that Seth had never heard of – shoe-fitting fluoroscopes, also sold under the name x-ray shoefitter, pedoscope and footoscope. These were x-ray fluoroscope machines installed in shoe stores in the U.S. in the 20s. In the second half of the 20th century, growing awareness of radiation hazards and increasingly stringent regulations forced their gradual phase-out. Bans began in the states in the 1950s.

What Seth Learned on the Monsterweb

12:24 – Jonathan looks up “living will” online 48:29 – Jonathan looks up “Reginald VelJohnson” online. Seth wants him to search his name along with “gay crack addict.”

UYD Stories

3:42 – Seth has a Michael Jordan poster printed by Sports Illustrated where his name is spelled “Michael Jordon.” 28:41 – The last day of school in eighth grade, Seth and his buddies had shaving cream wars, where they would whack people’s ears with it. Jonathan remembers egging, TPing and shaving cream-ing around Halloween. He would stick a pin in the tip of the Barbasol and then melt the tip with the pin around it, and when you pull the pin out you’ve left a pinhole-sized hole, so when you spray it, it goes about 50 feet, silly string style. 54:26 – Jonathan says there’s nothing worse than a shitty shower. He has a shitty shower in his house right now, and it’s the worst.

UYD News

13:40 – There was a lottery snafu where a bunch of women at a hair salon in Massachusetts went in on a ticket but one lady said she purchased one out of her own pocket. They’re fighting over $9 million. 22:25 – In Brunswick, Ga., a newly elected sheriff in coastal Georgia is putting idle inmates to work. Inmate work details in Glynn County will pick up garbage, clean the football stadium, remove mildew from the walls of county buildings, etc. “I’m tired of seeing them sitting around watching TV, sitting around drinking coffee and sitting around playing cards.” The program marks the first time county inmates will be allowed to work outside the detention center. County commissioner Richard Strickland praised Sheriff Neal Jump for starting the program. Inmates in the work detail program will be exposed to public view and will be less likely to get arrested again after their sentences are served, Jump said, adding that being seen by the public will embarrass them. 25:18 – Daylight Savings begins at 2 a.m. on Sunday, March 10. 27:08 – March is National Flour Month. 29:41 – On Tuesday, March 12, Bon Jovi will release their 12th studio album, What About Now? 38:40 – A nursing professor named Elizabeth Dowdell of Villanova University has reported in an interview with a CBS news affiliate in Philadelphia that she has discovered a new phenomena called “sleep texting.” She says it’s teenagers sending texts while at least partially asleep. She notes it occurs when teens receive a text, become aware of their phone beeping and then responds quite often with gibberish but sometimes with words they never intended to use. Dowdell attributes the behavior to overextended teens and said that being partially awoken by a beeping phone on a regular basis can lead to sleep deprivation, weight gain, depression and other mental disorders. She does not cite any studies on this newly discovered side effect of texting, but said she found it occurs most often when a teen receives a message after falling into a deep sleep – usually an hour and a half or two hours after falling into their sleep cycle. Most report not being able to remember hearing their phone beep, answering it or writing a reply. 49:44 – The South Dakota State Fair – “Starry Nights and Midway Lights” will be Aug. 29-Sept. 2 in Huron, S.D. Three Doors Down will headline the fair. 54:59 – What if the black box in your new car becomes a tool to invade your privacy? What if, on the other hand, it winds up saving your life after an accident? Those are some of the questions being raised over black box data and event recorders in cars.

Awesome Studies

8:16 – USA Today Snapshots: Adults who have spelled out end-of-life instructions with a health care directive. Between ages 18-44, 8% don’t know or refuse to answer the question. 17% said yes they had, 75% had not. Over age 44, 49% had not, 7% did not know or refused and 44% had. 53:40 – A Boston marketing and public relations company has analyzed what people say about hotels by studying more than 18,000 online conversations for a 6-month period of time on various social websites, blogs and forums. The company, Broder Partners, used for the first time what it calls a conversational relevance to measure how much people talk about a hotel and how much of it is positive. Despite all the money and effort hotels put into selecting comfortable beds and soft pillows, a new study suggests that hotel guests are more likely to choose a hotel based on the water pressure in the shower. When guests had conversations about what they like to see or feel in the room, most of the talk was about the shower – specifically the water pressure – surpassing talk about bed or sheets. 57:49 – UC-Davis scientists collected air pollution particles in Fresno and then exposed laboratory mice to them. They found that one of the most toxic sources of air pollution was the backyard grill. Along with particles from vehicles and wood-burning emissions, particulates from residential cooking had the greatest measurable impacts on mice lung function. “That was like, wow,” said Anthony Wexler, the study’s co-author and director of the Air Quality Research Center at UC-Davis. “It’s not that you’re cooking, it’s how you’re cooking. We think it’s the charcoal briquettes that are the problem.” 1:01:24 – Mathematicians at the University of Vermont analyzed 10 million tweets by using a list of 10,000 words rated on a 10-point scale as “happy,” “sad” or “neutral.” They threw out the neutral words. They ranked all 50 states based on these words. The number one happiest state was Hawaii. 1:02:35 – The Gallup Healthways Well Being Index just came out, providing quality of life rankings by state. For the fifth year in a row, the number one state was Hawaii. The bottom five states for overall well-being: 46) Herda, 47) Hatta, 48) Her-Hadda. … 46) Arkansas, 47) Tennessee, 48) Mississippi, 49) Kentucky and 50) West Virginia.

Letters to the Editor

33:20 – Dear Amy / Jonathan: “I’m a 44-year-old with a live-in boyfriend. WE get along really well, our families have blended quite nicely. There’s one ongoing issue in our three-year relationship. I’m not comfortable with how many nights my partner spends just sitting at a bar. He says he’s just going for an hour or two to visit with the boys. These ‘boys’ are all men over 50. Most of them are alcoholics. They all drink and drive on a regular basis. I’ve expressed my concerns several times and when I do he seems to go out less often but always slips back into that same pattern. He says he only goes 3 or 4 times a week. Most lunch hours he can be found at a bar and he drinks at home daily. I’m ready to run for the hills. He thinks he and his buds are popular because every bartender/waitress knows them intimately. It makes me cringe. I’m embarrassed beyond belief. I cannot think of marrying this man (he has proposed) because of all these red flags. Am I being a ‘nag’ (his word) or a doormat?”

From the Archives

6:59 – Seth keeps getting voicemails claiming there was a Breaking Bad episode that stole from Jonathan. On Episode 021 of UYD on July 3, 2006, at the 31-minute mark, they were talking about meth addicts who were stealing property under tarped home in neighborhoods. Jonathan posited a theory that you should post up for 48 hours and make a mobile lab while you’re in there. In Breaking Bad’s fifth season, episode three, called “Hazard Pay,” they did this very thing.

Canceled American TV Shows

45:57 – 10-8: Officers on Duty. This was an American police drama that aired on ABC. It was canceled after 12 episodes. It started in September 2003 and was produced by Aaron Spelling. Episode titles include “Hard Days Night,” “BloodSugarSexMagik,” “Gimme Shelter,” and “Lucy in the Sky.”