View Episode 013
Originally aired 05.08.06
14:30 – (long pause in place of jingle) Dolphins lineman Jason Taylor knifed; homeless man kills another one over a can of beer; homeless man killed over box of raisins (Jah: “That is the worst thing I have ever heard”); man arrested in Titusville sitting outside of a school looking at child porn on his laptop; woman opens her window at night in Tampa and thought she felt a cockroach crawling on her, then feels a tongue in her ear, then sees a dude at her window who yells at her in Spanish and goes out the window like a “crab;” high school teacher was carrying out an illicit love affair with a 17-year-old, who was going to tell, so he brought her into the woods, strangled her and broke her neck. She’s in intensive care clinging to life, but her uncle, after findout the news, had a heart attack and died; dude wearing a Scream mask goes around his neighborhood in Dielin stabbing women; baby dies when father leaves her in car – “It’s not my fault. I get distracted; I got a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old also” Seth: “You don’t even get it, UN-Dad;” woman in Coral Springs was dying in her apartment, police show up to save her, but woman who runs the apartment complex refuses to give them a key because it’s “against the rules to give a key to someone who is not a tenant,” police climb through her back window and find her dead … “Make it fine with 49.” (23:50 and 26:03) … Jah proposes that UYD carves a moat that separates Florida from the rest of the union, and says the Floridians wouldn’t even be able to figure out how to get across the water dividing them
18:02 – Peed taking photos of kids trying on shoes at local Wal-Marts
57:36 – Glide – veg-friendly rubbers (veganessentials.com) Jah: “I won’t be using these but I will be eating them.”
34:11 – OUT: Competitive Gaming. IN: Table Tennis
46:57 – Terror Squad feat. DJ Khaled, Lil’ Wayne, Paul Wall, Rick Ross and Pitbull “Holla at Me”
48:36 – Brooks & Dunn - “Play Something Country”
49:48 – Bill Tucker, assistant inspector for the West Virginia Office of Miners Health Safety and Training: “I don’t recall the exact words I used. I was just screaming out for help. I may have said ‘They’re alive.’ There was a lot of miscommunication around that.”
58:40 – Seth spots Vin Diesel and John Basedow at the 7-11 at Western and Santa Monica fighting over whether they should get a Red Bull or Rockstar.
27:34 – Spring Break’s not awesome enough; now they have to get legal drugs in Mexico. Seth says no one dies from drug overdoses anymore; Jah says this is because people are pussies and when he would do it people would die. Seth is jealous that he got to miss out on so much by not going to Amsterdam and not going to Mexico to get legal drugs because it’s so close to him and now he’s sober
2:40 – Jonathan forgets to watch TCAP, as well as the America’s Most Wanted spinoff. Guy says his pants are “fucked up.” Next week they’re headed to Florida, and Chris Hansen says “It’s almost like we’ve entered a cyber predator twilight zone.” (6:33) … America’s Most Wanted version was good because it featured John Walsh yelling at the peeds: “Hey scumbag! You big baby!” (8:00) … Clinical psychologist quote: “The predators say they’re ‘idiots’ but they’re not, because idiots wouldn’t be able to carry out such sophisticated planning.” Seth: “Uh, sophisticated planning? Hey I’m 53. Hey I’m 12. You wanna blow me? Sure. What’s your address? I live on Main Street. I’ll be there (tires screech). That’s wicked sophisto.” (9:44) … Chris Hansen reading transcript to dude: “You asked him, ‘Do you have any body hair?’” Peed: “Umm, that’s a normal chat question.” (12:00) … Old dude devouring cookies on table: “I love chocolate chip!” Chris Hansen: “Would you like some milk with those cookies?” Peed: “Sure!” (14:09)
25:28 – Of the 32 countries at the World Cup, every single country has a flag of their country on the back of their bus except U.S.A. so they won’t blow us up
38:54 – A review of CBS News Sunday Morning’s Into the Future: 2001 segment from 1986: rep from GM says car will be commanded by own voice; bathroom will be a crazy collage with a stationary bike and bed, etc.
41:21 – More collect calls are made on Father’s Day than any other day. Seth: “Hey dick dad – thanks for raping me. I hate you and you’re going to die! Sperm donor dad! Click.”
41:56 – The United States Postal Service (USPS) has created a Forever Stamp that will always be usable, despite the rising costs of postage.
51:00 – Ohio man being put to death leans up to executioner after lethal injection is given: “It’s not working.”
24:26 – Jah interjects that Adam Curry coined the term “podcast”
52:37 – Famous last meals before death penalty. Jonathan declares he does not like this segment, and says the image of Timothy McVeigh eating two pints of mint chocolate chip ice cream could, on the wrong day, actually make Jonathan cry
32:08 – Jah hammers David Blaine for his “Drowned Alive” stunt where he will try to break the record of holding his breath for 8 minutes, 58 seconds
39:19 – Seth rips the rep from GM who, in 1986, predicted wack things about the future