View Episode 034
Originally aired 10.09.06
1:00:43 – just Jah
24:12 – UYD: Saving America from herself
25:19 – UYD: Brought to you by Tide
31:47 – UYD: Tournament world
32:43 – Crocs: America’s deadliest footwear
32:53 – Crocs: Dead comfy
37:04 – House of Carters debuted and it is on between the two brothers; Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team started last week on CMT – this is Seth’s favorite show; Fashion House is not a TV pick – Jah thought it was a VHS porn at first; I Pity The Fool starring Mr. T is on TV Land Wednesday night at 10 p.m.; CSI Thursday night, 9 p.m., features Kevin Federline.
26:27 – Energia – Clamato with ginseng, taurine and guarana
45:42 – Capgras Syndrome: Seth holds the delusional belief that an acquaintance has been replaced by an identical-looking impostor
49:35 – Miami Dade police officer jacks coke from evidence locker and sells it on the street wearing police uniform; Tampa man driving under the influence plows car into front of police station; deputy accidentally shoots self in face with .45 at party; mom tries to send cell phone photo of her daughter to her mom, but grandma receives pornographic image instead; woman lights self on fire while smoking a cigarette at a gas station; woman growing weed in backyard just thought it was “her son’s special plant;” grandparents cut grandson’s arm, let him bleed onto a Bible and read scripture out of it; elderly blind man robbed of clothes and beaten with own cane, then stripped naked; man slept with dead girlfriend and then euthanized her cats, etc.
12:41 – Jonathan comes up with the official title off the cuff at 12:50 – “Who’s Mommin’ Harder?” A) Mom gives 2-year-old child morphine to get rid of cough; B) Mom gives 18-month-old daughter a bong hit
28:41 – Jimmy Dean’s sausage and chocolate chip pancakes on a stick
4:27 – Petaluma, California recap
43:36 – To Catch a Predator? To Catch an Angel? To Catch an Awesomeness.
57:13 – Title not mentioned:
In the past three days I have written so much shit that I am about to explode / I forget what the fuck I’m talking about half the time / And haven’t been outside but two times today / And even then it was just time to smoke a cigarette / My God my mind has gone blank / There is so much to write about that I can't get the first word down / I have to admit though it is kinda fun just constantly working / I'm getting better at typing / This is something I set out to do and slowly I am completing it / Sorry I am giving you all this shit / But it just helps to write out whats going on in the mind of a lunatic.
Seth’s response: “FUCK YOU MAN! Oh my God it really says that.”
9:40 – Someone gives Jah their e-mail address: xxxx@aol.com…. Jah has a panic attack.
10:02 – At Jah’s job, works with two women who are filling in for others. One of women is ringing up a guy, swiping a brand-new Visa card 5-6 times backwards. Guy hands her a new card, Discover, backwards 6 times and says it’s not working. Jah almost explodes at her.
43:44 – Jonathan’s story about stupid guy in movie theater: Eddie Murphy man, he fell off on that one.
31:50 – People wearing Crocs getting stuck on escalators and trampled
9:11 – We learn that Seth has a degree in Communications from a good school (Emerson) and graduated before the internet
19:18 – Seth: “7-7-07, mark your calendars. What episode will we be on by then? Well we’ll be on satellite by then.”
0:26 – Diet Pepsi Jazz rips off Jonathan and Seth’s scat jazz tune from Episode 28 @ 41:48
6:39 – Jonathan going off on people talking about YouTube like it’s a new revolution – magazine stand at Laurel and Ventura
10:15 – Jonathan going off on stupid woman at cash register
34:41 – Seth and Jonathan going off on stupid bumper sticker people (Seth: “I don’t play by the rules man. I’m countercultural! What are you dude? You hippie fruits. Take those Crocs off before I kill you with a 103-inch Panasonic television. Bam!”)
42:08 – Seth rips himself for saying Law & Order: SUV
42:44 – Seth going off on stupid people in movie theaters, etc.
5:15 – Jonathan: “There’s a lot of gentlemen of Indian descent on TCAP … it’s not totally fair because I’m pretty sure they’re allowed to fuck 13-year-olds there.”