View Episode 047
Originally aired 01.15.07
1:02:19
38:06 – UYD: Sponsored by Mac
22:32 – On Thursday, Jan. 18, Stephen Colbert will appear on The O’Reilly Factor and later that night Bill O’Reilly will appear on The Colbert Report.
23:39 – Meth coffee
55:20 – Baby tossed in oven; man attacks woman at wrong address; man lit on fire while working on car in garage; man in motel room lights self on fire; released convict misses friends in Florida State Penitentiary, out for less than two weeks, hands teller a note saying he’s going to rob it, waits in lobby for police to arrest him so he can go back; couple robbed of everything including an urn containing their 4-year-old child’s ashes; etc.
4:13 – Philadelphia couple and diehard Eagles fans put ad on Craig’s List where, in exchange for tickets, they would let a stranger watch them have sex in bedroom – they can even call the plays during the action. Ad gets pulled.
34:21 – Nokia and Visa turn a cell phone into a credit card cell phone
34:55 – Jawbone headset blocks out background noise
35:12 – Sharp’s 108-inch LCD display
27:10 – OUT: Black, white, green teas. IN: Red tea
Games That Jonathan and Seth Play
0:29 – Seth: “What’s the best thing you’ve ever eaten in your life? You know what mine was? The Cinnamon Melt I had this morning at 7:15 at the McDonald’s on Western.” Jah had a peanut butter-honey-and-Cookie Crisp sandwich he had one night when he was stoned that he thought was the best. His other was a Paul Prudom hand made filet mignon at K Paul’s in the French quarter – sauce took three days to make
5:58 – Jonathan’s lotto ticket story. Instead of getting more lotto tickets, the scratch-off winner at the gas station asks for the money and says there’s no way he’s going to be lucky three times. Just as Jah is thinking that this is a pretty smart dude, the guy gets handed $2
12:09 – Jonathan’s story about getting pissed on by a 6-foot-8 dude riding a Ninja in the bathroom of an office building. Jah gets the spray from the urinal onto his leg. Seth: “So as you’re looking at his cock he’s smiling at you? This is an interesting story.” Jah: “Huge prick.” Seth: “Huge prick, too, you say. I mean you saw it. And he saw you and he smiled. I think it was a nice afternoon.”
17:48 – Jah says he hocked his Tony Gwynn 1974 Topps rookie card for weed when he was 15 years old. “It’s the one fact I would actually say I’m spot-on about.” Jah later retracts when he discovers that Tony Gwynn was a rookie in 1983. (19:32)
20:30 – AVN Best Film from Wicked Pictures: Fuck
39:17 – CVS starts to put condoms behind the counter
40:52 – Designer Babies and Deformer Babies
42:55 – Pillow angel – 4-foot-5 and 65 pounds at 9 years old. Doctors estimate she’ll be 5-6, 115-120 pounds as an adult, but the parents are giving her hormones that will keep her from getting any bigger so she will be easier to take care of
45:59 – Gang member with bullet stuck in head
49:58 – Pizza chain getting death threats because they are now accepting pesos. (Seth mispronounces Pizza Patrón)
52:12 – Oh Snap! story – college student sends professor disc filled with child pornography instead of final exam
0:13 – This show is brought to us by McDonald’s Cinnamon Melts
8:07 – Seth announces his affinity for the Dallas Cowboys
31:26 – Jonathan creams over the iPhone
36:01 – Jah ponders what the movie Fuck looks like on the 108-inch Sharp LCD
1:01:23 – First plug for donating to show
39:28 – Jah starts to hammer on CVS for the low-rent operation they’re running and the crack baby outpatients working there