View Episode 088
Originally aired 10.26.07
1:01:42
15:03 – Seth references Diet Pepsi Max with Panax
37:35 and cont. at 43:22 – TWIF makes triumphant return with no theme song: cities ban masks b/c so many people had crimes in costume last year; in Niceville two longtime enemies had a violent confrontation at the annual mullet festival; in Bradenton a school bus driver fails a drug test and blames it on middle school students b/c of second-hand pot smoke
44:36 – (combined) Trace Adkins – “I Got My Game On.”
39:38 – Seth reminiscing about his travails with whippets and mushrooms with his boy Ethan Banville
42:29 – Seth’s life sucks now that he’s sober and off the drugs
Games That Jonathan and Seth Play
4:46 – Since 1999, how many times has Google altered its logo? Jah does some wicked crazy math in his head, then answers “700.” Correct answer is 140.
34:48 - Jah: "Twiiin meal!" Seth: "Show me the meeeeeal!"
10:30 – Seth spent one night at UMass and it was typical college fare – fire extinguisher going off, he saw both pantsless men and women in the hallways, saw a lot of Schlitz canned beer being consumed, some marijuana being smoked
19:26 – Jah tells story about cyberskin mouth/throat sex toy that he bought and is found by housekeeper Mima
28:29 – At movie theater, Seth spots woman in denim shorts, fanny pack, visor: “One for Ben Stiller.”
30:22 – Seth is in traffic on Melrose and Rossmore, and hears a homeless guy carrying on an animated and intense discussion with a poster for Women’s Murder Club
31:21 – Jah watched a dude in traffic once gazing up at a Bacardi poster, looking at one of the girls like he was ready to bone down
39:40 – Seth’s story about going to a Carnivale in Hollywood after doing whippets and mushrooms behind a port-a-potty; makes out with a girl on the front lawn of someone’s house, gets a ride home from her (drunk), crossing over Gower the girl drives past the turn, then makes a premature turn at Plymouth and goes up on the curb… Seth walks away, he and his friends hear her yelling; they go to another house and drink GHB
2:37 – Jah does his Jim Carrey “Smmokin!!”
3:00 – In the fourth inning of Game 2 of the World Series, Red Sox rookie Jacoby Ellsbury won America a free taco with his stolen base
6:46 – Maxim’ unsexiest women list: features Britney Spears, Madonna, Sandra Oh, Amy Winehouse, Sarah Jessica Parker
8:50 – More than one-quarter of the pregnant women in West Virginia smoked last year
9:51 – UMass offering a new class, History 297D – “How Does the Song Go: The Grateful Dead As A Window Into American Culture”
14:44 – Pepsi delivery man and Coke delivery man get into fistfight on loading dock of Pennsylvania Wal-Mart – Pepsi wins
17:44 – Durex condoms is taking applications for condom testers – received over 4,000 applicants
52:56 – Rudy Giuliani’s best friend is a defrocked priest who’s molested kids and can’t be a priest. Giuliani defends him and says he didn’t do it. During his trial, his defense attorney went to one of the high schools where he was going nuts and interviewed four kids he didn’t molest. Seth: “If you were defending a murderer, could you grab four people out of Starbucks and be like, ‘Did you ever get murdered by my dude?’ and they’d be like ‘No.’ And be like, These four people were not murdered by my client, what’s up now? You lookin’ at these four people? They weren’t murdered by him, so how could he murder him?”
56:35 – Couple in Spokane, WA, going through a divorce – husband plans an elaborate front lawn Halloween extravaganza, asks the wife to come in and get on the ladder and test out the noose. Husband turns the radio up, shuts the garage door and kicks the ladder out from underneath her. Wife manages to slip out and run to neighbors’.
34:49 – Seth’s “Show me the meal!” comment causes Jah to erupt in laughter
51:39 – Seth reveals that he will be voting for Barack Obama
56:00 – Seth doesn’t like the new Radiohead record and said he got a gay vibe from it
13:01 – If Jonathan and Seth took the Grateful Dead class at UMass, Jah predicts that he would get an A- and Seth would get a C+
36:06 – Jah predicts he’ll go to Philly in his lifetime, but Seth thinks otherwise
9:04 – Seth rips West Virginia for smoking while pregnant and having bad teeth
33:43 – Seth goes off on the “in-between meal” that he saw advertised
35:03 – Seth rips Philadelphia for being the least attractive, stylish and friendly people according to Travel & Leisure: “Hey MotownPhilly, you back again? Because you’re ugly, you dress shitty and you’re super cruel.”
47:01 – If Seth hears one more thing about New York pizza vs. Chicago pizza he’ll go bananas: “I got an idea – no one eats pizza anymore! The last time I had pizza was at a sleepover at somebody’s birthday party in the seventh grade.”
48:46 – Seth goes off on Arkansas for their typographical error in a law that allows anyone under the age of 18 to get married with parental consent: “Hey Arkansas, you’re a crazy fucking state with married babies! Stop it!”
51:11 and 54:53 – Seth going off on Rudy Giuliani rooting for the Red Sox in the World Series: “Why don’t you go jerk off 9-11 with your priest buddy? (Choking noise) Gobble on the 11. (Choking noise) Dual gobbling 11s while you stick a 9 up one of your wife’s butts, like, 9-11! (Choking noise)
58:36 – Seth tells people to stop wearing costumes because Halloween is for the kids