View Episode 097
Originally aired 12.29.07
1:01:20
1:01:51
24:02 – Principal at elementary school in Lakeland, Fla. (married father of two) has briefcase containing several photos of nude women dressed up as little girls, faces were superimposed with several faces of female students
45:50 – Jah refers to Will Smith as a Christian/SciTi weirdo
11:25 – Crocs emblazoned with sports team logos
44:30 – Will Smith: “Even Hitler didn’t wake up going, ‘Let me do the most evil thing I can do today.’ I think he woke up in the morning, and, using a twisted, backwards logic, he set out to do what he thought was good. Stuff like that just needs reprogramming.”
26:04 – OUT: Nigerians. IN: Romanians
1:11 – Jah got his hair cut by one of Jonathan Antin’s minions and came out looking like Kenny G. It was shiny and hard and gelled and he felt like an asshole. He was in the studio with Wag and he came back and they were like “Looks good, dude,” but Jah was sure they were thinking it was horrible. There were the hottest girls working there, and he recalls seeing Jonathan Antin there also. He also remembers looking over and someone had dropped off a crazy homeless person to get a makeover. The dude tried to start combing her hair and couldn’t even get through one brushstroke
19:47 – Seth and his mom are in Larchmont Village, sees James Spader with his girlfriend and teenage son, introduces himself and his mom since they have the Boston connection. Seth mentions to Spade-dog that he does a podcast with John Larroquette’s son. He also mentions that his 1990 book Separated at Birth: Part 2 by Spy magazine has William Shatner and John Larroquette separated at birth. Spade-dog loves it, and Seth tells him he mailed it to John.
26:28 – Jah sees one of those Indian/Pakistani grifters who do sleight of hand brain-teaser bullshit and engaged him by saying “You are a lucky man.” Jah said “thank you” and kept walking. He tries to figure out if 1) they are all over the country, 2) what is this defacing of a wonderful people, 3) if it’s really profitable, etc. Often they try to walk you to an ATM to get more money from you. Jah admits he got grifted by one of them between 5-10 years ago. Seth has never dealt with one and tries to pull girls away from them on Larchmont. One of Jah and Seth’s mutual friends, referred to as “Lavachielli,” has been known to go off on them
51:58 – Jah waits outside with candy on Halloween night, wearing his Terminator zip-up hoodie. Kid told him he liked his sweatshirt and had the same one in black. Two days later he finds the same one being sold at a kiosk in Sherman Oaks for $50. 53:59 – Seth took his mom to Pinkberry, she got some samples and hated them, so they went to Baskin-Robbins for some ice cream. Michael Rappaport was there and couldn’t control his unruly children
7:40 – Panther fans started a website ruinromo.com, where you print out faces of Jessica Simpson, put them on sticks and distract him during the game. Jessica Simpson dubbed as “Yoko Romo.” Had a movie released last weekend called Blonde Ambition – made $1,322 this weekend – still more than Zyzzyx Road starring Tom Sizemore
17:21 – new law takes effect Jan. 1 in Texas – the pole tax – additional $5 fee for customers at strip clubs, proceeds go to rape victims
30:23 – NY Islanders player Miroslav Satan has 666 career points
30:50 – Panasonic will unveil a 150-inch plasma HDTV at the upcoming Consumer Electronics show (Sharp currently has largest at 108 inches)
46:37 – 29-year-old from Washington successfully “swats” someone for the 4th time … somehow he hacks into the phone system and acts like he’s calling the cops from other people’s residences screaming that someone has been murdered and they need to get there ASAP. Most recently a couple and their baby were awakened in the middle of the night and handcuffed for it. They call it “SWATting” because you get points for getting SWAT teams to show up, extra points for door being knocked down and people being cuffed
0:21 – Jonathan feels like dogshit
8:53 – Jonathan gives a Grateful Dead lyric, but is fearful that he’ll get it wrong and Slim Tim will be all up in his shit: If I had a gun for every ace I’ve drawn / I could arm a town the size of Abilene
16:47 – Jah asks if Seth felt as bad as he does when he did the show a few weeks ago. Seth felt worse during the days following the podcast
55:44 – Jonathan receives the following text from a UYD listener: I JUST SAW JUNO. IT’S GOOD. IT’S LIKE NAPOLEON DYNAMITE IN LOVE.
56:13 – Jah is very upset at all the hostility going on in the UYD forums, says he had no part of people getting banned (Cassie, Crow, harpua, Wally, Lizard King, etc.). Jah said he would sooner shut the forums down than let people be banned
1:00:56 – Despite being sick, Jah gives stirring renditions of “We Don’t Need Another Hero” and “I Don’t Wanna Lose Your Love Tonight”
5:58 – Inmate Jonathan Lee Riches files a few new lawsuits – suing Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz and Atlanta Falcons QB Michael Vick for $5 million claiming that they want to burn him with hot coffee; suing Angelina, Brad, Maddox, Zahara and Pax Pitt for kidnapping Madeline McCann in a plot to kidnap and adopt a child from 192 different countries – found out through pen pal Billy Bob Thornton; suing Sean “Puffy” Combs for assaulting him at a New York nightclub 5 years ago and stealing all his credit cards
59:08 – Seth: “2008 is going to be great. … I’ve never felt so good about a coming year. I hope our listeners feel the same way.”
32:03 – Jah is pissed that every time he walks in a Starbucks he’s directly behind somebody who’s never been in one before. “So, what’s the deal here? What do you mean what’s the deal? The deal is I’ve got somebody waiting in the car for me, you fucking idiot!”