View Episode 132
Originally aired 09.13.08
1:07:33
20:30 – UYD: Through the mouth of babes
Games That Jonathan and Seth Play
24:21 – Seth asks Jah to name three people who could never go wrong in his book. Jah says Daft Punk, Johnny Depp, Guttenberg and possibly Jeff Goldblum and Justice
46:09 – New teen drug getting talked about an awful lot lately – snurf pills. Sold over the internet. 4 teens were hospitalized. The pills contain DMX, which is found in cough suppressants and is a disassociative drug that borders on hallucinogenic
26:38 – Jah was watching a 9-year-old on the side of the road, and he was sitting on the curb with his body contorted in a weird way. Jah figured out he was texting and his body was all jacked up trying to do it on his tiny phone. Jah thought he was too young to be texting, then realized he’s old as balls
34:54 – Jah took a flight last week on Virgin America, which he compared to being inside of an iMac because everything is ambient lighting and white plastic and everything has a sheen to it. In-flight entertainment was tv, video games, internet access, drinks you can order from the screen by swiping your credit card and an ichat where you can talk to other passengers on the plane. Jah says there were super fruit gay flight attendants on board
41:14 – On Jah’s return flight, he was running quite late and got checked in, gave his boarding pass and entered a long line at security. He got to where it split into the 3-4 metal detectors, and a guy in front of him opened a bottle of water and started drinking it. Jah walks around him and asks if he could jump ahead, the guy nods with a mouthful of water and when Jah had gotten 4-5 feet away the guy said “Just pay it forward. Let somebody else go around you in line next time.”
52:49 – Seth was at a baseball practice as a young boy standing on the pitcher’s mound going apeshit, scratching his head, and someone realized that one of his teammates had lice and they were all sharing the same helmet
53:36 – In preschool, Jah remembers seeing a girl in front of him pulling a piece of her hair to the side and Jah could visibly see eggs in her infested hair (Episode 039, 39:35)
3:04 – New ecological threat: Global dimming – a marked decrease in the amount of sunlight that reaches the earth’s surface. Jah thinks it’s because so many people are tanning. For Jah’s birthday Seth got him 5 sessions at Ibiza Tan on Fairfax. Jah has 2 remaining tans
4:53 – Naming rights for new football stadium for NY Giants and NY Jets may go to a German insurance company called Allianz that worked with the Nazis in WWII. They denied insurance for any of the Jews or their family members who died at Auschwitz death camp.
6:07 – Neighbors complaining about a house on a street in Council Bluffs, Iowa, which features a black doll hanging from a cross in their yard. The owner says it is not racist but sentimental. The owner’s dog’s name is also Hitler.
12:12 – Col. Sanders’ original handwritten recipe of 11 herbs and spices was removed from KFC’s corporate offices for the first time in several decades, allowing KFC to revamp the security that surrounds the company’s biggest secret
15:04 – Levi Johnston, the fiancé of Sarah Palin’s pregnant daughter (Bristol), has some interesting quotes on his Myspace page: I’m a fuckin redneck who likes to snowboard and ride dirtbikes. But I live to play hockey. I like to go camping and hang out with the boys. Do some fishing, shoot some shit and just fuckin chillin.’ You fuck with me, I’ll kick ass. I don’t want kids.
17:28 – New food items at the Texas State Fair: chicken fried bacon and deep fried jelly beans
21:51 – Growing danger on American roads is stunting – people doing tricks on motorcycles, videotaping and putting them on YouTube.
26:03 – American parents are facing a common problem of babysitters who spend more time texting than watching their kids
29:01 – Retired gay porn star Kurt Wild was fired from his job at Subway after a customer who recognized him complained and threatened a boycott of the store if he wasn’t fired
33:33 – The Association of Professional Flight Attendants, which represents 19,000 American Airlines flight attendants, wants the airline to install software that prevents passengers from surfing porn on their handheld internet devices in the backs of chairs
39:22 – In Rockland, Calif., 34-year-old Keith Fonte was arrested after walking up to two different groups of men completely nude and asking if they wanted to play. One group booked it and the other group called the authorities. He was later identified by another group that had seen him do it on another day
40:27 – Walter Freeman, a 72-year-old sex offender, left a courthouse and was rearrested 30 minutes later standing next to an ice cream truck offering to buy two young boys an ice cream
48:35 – As fuel prices are rising many schools are limiting school bus routes, and now they have “walking school buses” where kids walk together in a long line to school. Seth is pissed about this and compares it to when people would call airport taxis “limousines.”
50:59 – The Insurance Institute for Highway Safety is attempting to raise the minimum age to have a driver’s license to 18 years old
52:24 – New battle for American parents – superlice. Lice that have developed a full immunity to all currently used insecticides
56:18 – Brad Garrett, former star of Everybody Loves Raymond, had a prostate exam live on national television for the Step Up to Cancer fund
58:01 – A 22-year-old graduate student at Sacramento State is auctioning off her virginity, teaming up with Dennis Hoff of the Bunny Ranch to sell herself to the highest bidder. She wants someone who is intelligent and tender. She is paying for her master’s in marriage and family therapy
1:01:09 – A robber in a wheelchair armed with a bat and a knife rolled into a Dallas 7-11, beat the register with the bat until it opened. He took no cash, instead he pocketed a box of condoms and an energy drink.
0:34 – UYD makes the executive decision to throw everybody out of the studio. No cameras, no wireless microphones because Seth says they’ve lost an intimacy in the last 8 weeks
9:05 – Seth’s home phone rings in the middle of the episode and Seth can’t believe he forgot to turn the ringer off. “Is that rude? Where I come from people don’t call after 9:00.”
11:29 – Seth wonders if people actually enjoy eating KFC
1:05:53 – UYD got a voicemail message from a blind listener in Arizona. He was in the mall and a dude tried to jack his wallet, which was attached by a chain. The guy said he was trying to get a look at the chain. When the blind man told security they threw him out, not the would-be burglar.
7:57 – Seth is pissed that everyone he knows or speaks to is making references to Taco Bell. Jah thinks maybe it’s because of the strained financial times and people are eating budget food
22:42 – Seth rips on Lil’ Wayne for bowing down to Kid Rock. Lil’ Wayne was on Seth’s list of people who could never go wrong, but now he’s on the bottom of his list
43:52 – Seth hammers Lance Armstrong for coming out of retirement because no one gives a fuck that he rode a bike, stopped riding the bike and is now going to ride the bike again. He also lumps Michael Phelps into the mix