View Episode 237
Originally aired 09.30.2010
1:14:37
25:56 – Introducing Ladynet: By UYD
53:34 – UYD: Boutique shit
56:39 – We need to annex Florida for ourselves.
Games That Jonathan and Seth Play
2:00 – Seth gives J-dawg 3 women and he has to be one for the rest of his life – Kim Kardashian, Lindsay Lohan or Paris Hilton: J-dawg quickly chooses Paris Hilton. If it wasn’t for the dude who Paris fucked in the sex tape, says Jah, the answer would be hands-down Paris.
3:41 – Jah was sitting in a store today talking about the movie 8 Mile starring Eminem, shortly after seeing Inception in a theater, and he was referencing Brittany Murphy’s death. The person Jah was talking to said, “Yeah, and her husband.” J-dawg had no idea the husband had died shortly after Brittany.
6:05 – Jah watched A Single Man with Colin Firth (Episode 171, 9:56) and Julianne Moore. He liked Inception and admits that Leo is the real deal. His face has aged so he kind of looks like a man, so he’s not mad at him anymore.
9:41 – Jah just found out that a UYD listener bought a red 1993 Plymouth Sundance – the same car as Seth’s (except Seth’s is blue). Seth thinks he and this listener should race for pinks at midnight after the live shows at the Broad Stage on Oct. 2.
18:10 – Seth was on an all-star baseball team in the eighth grade and he was hanging out with four of his buddies at Plum Beach in the summer. They couldn’t wait to get to the main center and talk to girls. There was one dude who didn’t want to go and they couldn’t figure out why. The dude turned out to be bona fide gay, as Seth found out about 5 years ago. Jah says he doesn’t know if he knows any childhood friends who came out at a later time. He doesn’t even remember anyone being out when he was growing out. He wonders what the oldest age is that you could possibly realize you’re gay. Seth says 44.
33:26 – Jah tells a story about his friends who got high on cocaine and went to a gun range in the Valley on Thanksgiving Day. They were firing guns on coke and an Asian dude walked in, rented a gun, walked up to the stall next to them and blew his brains out next to them. The back of his head flew off, he hits the ground and blood begins to seep across the floor everywhere. Within seconds, the employees are alerted as to what’s happened and they come out with two bags of kitty litter, dump it on the ground and soak up the blood. It seemed like it happened fairly regularly.
36:23 – Jah had a friend who volunteered at a suicide hotline when he was younger. He thinks it was the male live-in nanny that he used to have, who recently hit J-dawg up on Facebook. He now oversees a ballet troupe in Los Angeles. He remembers him starting to volunteer and then realizing no one there was going to keep anyone from killing themselves because all of them were fulfilling community service hours and would laugh at the people when they revealed their problems.
42:44 – Somebody texted Jah this week, “The McFarthest I’ve ever had to drive is 3 blocks.” (Episode 236, 57:06)
43:20 – Seth and Jah were just looking at a picture of Seth from when he was a senior in high school. He is wearing rolled-up cuffed cutoff jeans. He looks so happy and so young and is being thrown up in the air by 12 other people. That moment, captured in time, was the happiest he’s ever been in his life. Seth says he needs 12 listeners on Oct. 2 to throw him up in the air.
51:14 – J-dawg has heard horror stories about Verizon / Time Warner technicians coming out to people’s houses and having no idea what they’re doing or how to help them. J-dawg thinks some kabillionaire needs to start a “Shit That Works Company.” Jah remembers that when he first got cable internet and nobody else had it in Hollywood, it was pure glory. It never crashed and the tech support dudes were right around the corner on Vine.
58:03 – Jah’s girlfriend is doing the master cleanse. Jah went to buy lemons, and if he was investing in something, it would be lemons because they’re a buck apiece. Non-organics were 90 cents apiece and organics were 98 cents apiece and even smaller than non-organics. When Seth saw her, she was on Day 1 and she called Seth “Sean.” Jah is noticing some word-jumbling from her. Whenever Seth did the master cleanse (Episode 060, 13:58) he couldn’t even follow an episode of Friends.
1:11:01 – Jah gets a lot of old $20 bills, which raise some eyebrows. He gave one to a dude at a 7-11 recently and all three employees got together to size it up before accepting it.
6:52 – Luxury car maker Bentley has recalled 596 vehicles that are currently stalking U.S. streets because the famous winged-bee hood ornament can become corroded and not fold down during driving, causing serious injury if the car was to strike a pedestrian.
11:11 – Mark David Chapman is the gentleman who shot and killed John Lennon outside of the Dakota in New York City on Dec. 8, 1980. He considered killing Johnny Carson but the ex-Beatle was more accessible. J-dawg said it was because he traveled through underground walkways. Seth thinks it would’ve been weird if Chapman killed Johnny Carson.
20:29 – A woman in Wisconsin was almost choked to death by her ex-boyfriend. She fought for her life and endured cuts and scratches on her throat and face. Her case was assigned to the Wisconsin District Attorney. The DA is also the chairman of a crime victim’s rights group. While prosecuting her case, after he met her, he sent her 30 sexual text messages in three days after meeting her. Some examples: “I’m the attorney. I have the $350,000 house. I have the six-figure career. You may be the tall, hot, young nymph, but I’m the prize. … Are you the kind of girl that likes secret conduct with an older, married, elected DA? The riskier, the better. … I want you to be so hot and treat me so well. Are you that good?” Another woman came out and said he invited her to an autopsy provided she would be his girlfriend and wear high heels and a miniskirt.
27:20 – The U.S. Transportation Department doesn’t know how many dogs have traveled on commercial airlines, but it recently tallied how many have died on planes in the last five years. The analysis showed that a surprising number of dogs who died on commercial flights were short-faced or smash-faced dogs like pugs. Airlines are required to report pet deaths but not the total number of pets transported. Of the 122 dogs that have died on planes since May of 2005, about half of them were short-faced, including 25 English bulldodgs, 11 pugs, 6 french bulldogs, 2 boxers and 2 pekinese. Still, the federal agency said that in general it is safe to transport pets by plane. The dogs with short faces may be at higher risk because such breeds are prone to respiratory problems – typically they don’t breathe as efficiently as other breeds, said Kimberly Ann May, a veterinarian and spokeswoman for the American Veterinary Medical Association.
32:17 – The Arms Room opened up in League City, Texas, in an abandoned Circuit City. It includes a state-of-the-art 15-lane gun range, a massive gun shop from pistols to AKs, an antiques firearms store within the gun store, an on-site gunsmith, classes to get your Texas concealed handgun license, etc.
35:10 – Seth references a story about a 42-year-old guy who killed himself at the Firing Line Indoor Shooting Range in Burbank. It has a history of self-inflicted shooting deaths. At least 2 people have gone there and done it. They now have a two-person minimum at the shop, with the hopes that someone would be less likely to commit suicide in front of another friend.
39:37 – The United Nations convened this week in NYC for the 65th General Assembly. There are 192 member states. Seth saw some examples of diplomatic immunity being used effectively. The most common offense is parking tickets, followed by theft. Secret Service agents arrested a Mexican diplomat in New Orleans in 2008. He stole a bunch of White House staffers’ Blackberrys and flew back to Mexico with them. In 2005, diplomats from Zaire were staying in an apartment in New York, racked up $4,000 in rent, didn’t pay it and left. Phillipine diplomats took an office space, turned it into a restaurant, bank and travel agency, rang up a $1 million tax bill, didn’t pay it and left. Murder is rare but it happens. In 1984, Libyan diplomats shot and killed a police officer from the window in their embassy in London and never admitted fault.
50:04 – There’s new contracts with City Hall that mandate Time Warner Cable and Cablevision in New York must give customers a month of free service for being late to their appointments.
53:38 – When it comes to counterfeit cash, the game is basically hot potato. Whoever gets stuck with it last gets burned – whether it’s the bank or the local post office.
59:36 – As part of a public art project in Cambridge, Mass., parking enforcement officers were given 40,000 special parking tickets that feature instructions for stress-reducing yoga poses on the back of the tickets, such as the Citation Salutation – a play on the Sun Salutation. The city transportation chief said, “It’s trying to debunk the idea that all parking tickets are a hostile action, because I don’t think they are.”
1:47 – Where the F does the time Fing go? It’s October already, and Seth and J-dawg will see you this weekend.
4:59 – Seth dips back into The Town and how he was disturbed by the nun habits and the ghost masks. He was even more disturbed by the opening scene, when they’re wearing Skeletor masks and purple dredlocks.
55:16 – Jonathan and Seth think that bartering is the way everything should be nowadays. Jah thinks that if we’re moving that way, everyone in UYD nation is covered because we have our own community and could be self-sufficient using the talents that each of us possess. Jah recommends that everyone who listens to this show needs to move to Hollywood. Seth says we all have to buy property within a 6-block radius of the studio and just take over as a gang.
1:04:31 – Seth and Jah ponder what kind of vehicle Jim Carrey drives. Jah guesses maybe a played-out Porsche just because it costs $250,000 and he’s the worst. Jah thinks maybe he might be eco and have an electric Tesla.
1:08:57 – This week at the Broad Stage: 2 Live Show featuring Luther Campbell.
14:33 – A new survey was conducted to gauge America’s acceptance of gay couples. It found that 30% felt that pets would count as family but that gay couples would not count as family. Jah doesn’t understand this. Of all the people he deals with on a regular basis, gays are so low on the list of people who bother him. Seth thinks gays expedite the process during the course of a day.
17:53 – An article in Scientific American by a research psychologist forecasted adult sexual orientation in a child. It cited some studies.
46:46 – A recent observational study showed that 93% of U.S. women wash their hands in public restrooms. For men it was 77%.
21:15 – Jah goes off on travelers who take insane stuff on planes with them, as well as people who don’t even know how to run their debit card through an automatic checkout aisle at a grocery store.