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View Seth's Ailments

Category:Topics

Episode 009

44:34 – Seth’s news item from the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette inadvertently kicks off this segment. The paper reports “wrap rage,” extreme anger caused by product packaging that is difficult to open or manipulate

Episode 015

58:23 – Tanorexia: Seth was fired from his job because he needs to tan at all times. He’s filing for a disability check and he’s suing Hawaiian Tropic, Hollywood Tans, the sun and Jonathan

Episode 017

12:01 – Ringxiety: Seth can hear his cell phone ringing or feel it vibrating when it is not actually ringing or vibrating

Episode 018

9:38 – Body Dismorphic Disorder (BDD): Seth has an obsession with his appearance

Episode 019

36:41 – Season Affective Disorder (SAD): Seth gets deep, deep episodes of depression that coincide with the season decrease of daylight. GlaxoSmithKline has created a pill to try to fix this

Episode 020

5:24 – Coital Cephalalgia: When you get a searing headache after ejaculation

8:34 – Adult Onset Adolescence: Seth is building forts, got a bike, put baseball cards in the back spokes because his childhood was robbed from him

Episode 022

50:37 – Hoarding Syndrome: Seth keeps everything; he’s the king of the packrats and can’t throw anything away. He also has ASPD, or Anti-Social Personality Disorder, because he’s a dick who can’t play with others

Episode 023

19:36 – Prosopagnosia: Gives Seth an inability to recognize faces; he doesn’t even know who Jah is except by his voice and his gait

Episode 025

39:43 –Kleine-Levin syndrome (a.k.a. Sleeping Beauty Syndrome): Seth is asleep for 23 hours a day; he only wakes up for one hour to do UYD

Episode 026

4:44 – Heat Rage: Seth gets so irritable from the extreme West Coast summer heat that he goes into mad fits of rage; Morgellan’s Disease: fibers are coming out of Seth’s skin

Episode 027

3:25 – Sexsomnia: Seth can’t help but perform sexual acts while falling deep into REM sleep

Episode 028

22:55 – Pseudosuicide: Seth can fall in such a deep REM sleep that, coupled with his incredibly high threshold for pain, he can sleepwalk himself to death and not even know it

Episode 029

45:20 – Seth is allergic to broke

Episode 031

28:56 – Telephone Telepathy: Seth knows when Jah is going to call, e-mail and text him; Ingrained Caloric Perceptual Bias (ICPB): Seth’s mind and brain can’t properly gauge his daily caloric intake, and he keeps leaving things he ate out of his memory

Episode 032

28:11 – Jah has Disorder Telepathy, where he anticipates Seth’s disorders. Seth’s new disorder is Digital Amnesia, where digital technology fails him and the events in his life that were recorded digitally are lost forever

Episode 033

49:52 – Trymethylamineuria: chemical produced in your body that makes you reek of dead rotting fish, strikes mainly women

Episode 034

45:42 – Capgras Syndrome: Seth holds the delusional belief that an acquaintance has been replaced by an identical-looking impostor

Episode 036

1:56 – Dermatopathia pigmentosa reticularis (DPR): Seth can’t sweat, nor does he have fingerprints

Episode 037

28:46 – Trichotillomania: Seth has an uncontrollable urge to pull out his eyelashes

Episode 038

48:05 – Phantom Vibration Syndrome: Seth wakes up in the middle of the night feeling vibrations in his upper thigh like his phone is still there on vibrate.

Episode 039

49:31 – Toiletphobia a.k.a. parcopresis a.k.a. Bashful Bladder Syndrome: Seth can’t go to the bathroom outside of his own residence. Over 4 million people suffer from this

Episode 040

37:15 – Shopaholics are officially recognized in the American Journal of Psychiatry – 10 million sufferers in the U.S.; also Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) is recognized by the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention – 20% of adults take something to help go to sleep at night. Jah gets an e-mail from listener Neil, who has Phantom Vibration Syndrome (Episode 038), and wants to know what it is because he has it.

Episode 041

59:05 – Fourth person confirms they have Phantom Vibration Syndrome – make that five, because Seth’s mother has it as well. Amir simply gets it in his side thigh and it doesn’t have anything to do with his cell phone

59:51 – Holiday Rage: Long lines get Seth riled up

Episode 042

12:19 – Director of UCLA’s Impulse Control Disorder Clinic, Dr. Timothy Fong, declares that Black Friday has something innate, a caveman-like shopping sense that is propelling it. Like Tigers on the hunt, tracking down something of perceived value. When you get up really early and wait in line, the suffering triggers an instinct in you that says this is all for something, I will suffer and pounce and prey.

35:38 – Desk Rage (Workers Gone Wild): Jobs are so full of stress that people are going nuts in the “Dilbertization” of America, underpaid, overworked, underappreciated

Episode 043

52:02 – Synesthesia: Seth is a rare human being who tastes his words, a stimulation of one sensory or cognitive pathway leading to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway.

Episode 044

36:42 – Orthorexia: Seth is such a food nut, so specific and health-conscious in what he eats that he watches every single calorie; his raw vegan diet has his mind in such a frenzy that he has orthorexia – his friends can’t be around him and loved ones can’t bear to eat with him

Episode 045

3:04 – Disassociative Fuge: An intense psychological episode that causes a form of amnesia and enables Seth to take on an entirely different identity (Caleb). It happened to Seth at LAX at 1 a.m. when his passenger door was open and a cab almost tore his door off

Episode 046

47:15 – Spasmodic Dysphonia: Parts of Seth’s brain aren’t working properly and he can’t control his speech. He can only speak while reading poetry or right after sneezing. The only way he can treat it is with injections of botox to the area around his larynx

Episode 056

20:14 – Seth recalls his Spasmodic Dysphonia, but the botox injection to his larynx fixed that. He is now a Super Taster – he has specialized taste buds on the tip of his tongue and things like spinach, black coffee and broccoli are so bitter that he cannot ingest them. Seth does a wheatgrass and just grins and bears it to build up a tolerance against this; he drinks herbamatte instead of coffee and simply shuns spinach

Episode 060

17:18 – Addiction Transfer: 5 years ago Seth gave up drinking but he accelerated the eating. He went from 130 pounds 5 years ago to 295 pounds today

Episode 065

56:39 – Exercise Bulemia: Seth thinks about exercise so much that he is constantly burning calories. He’s on the elliptical machine nonstop and needs to have his cardio tracked. His weight is down to a manageable 190 pounds

Episode 066

41:32 – Popcorn Lung: Seth eats so much microwave popcorn that the butter flavor they’re using, diacietyl, heats up and creates a toxic gas and fume. The 6-9 bags that Seth eats every day are plugging his bronchioles with granulation tissue

Episode 068

9:47 - Seth's Popcorn Lung (Episode 066) starts to act up in the middle of the episode.

Episode 069

37:50 – GenXaphobia: Generation Y is so afraid of being old like Generation X-ers, that they’re taking preventative measures including botox, etc. They’re also upping their tech usage by twice as much because they’re so familiar with it

Episode 071

48:10 – Electro Hypersensitivity (EHS): Because of the electromagnetic smog in our atmosphere being created by all the laptops, wi-fi, cell phones, microwaves, TVs and radios, Seth is walking around in a magnetic beekeeper outfit that prevents him from exposure to dizziness, numbness in his extremities and heart palpitations

Episode 073

42:21 – Nature Deficit Disorder (NDD): Seth is always inside, he’s not outside getting fresh air or sunshine. It causes the same symptoms as his EHS. To solve it he’ll go to indoor places that have outdoor names, like the restaurant Trails

Episode 078

45:57 – Sungazing/Solar Healing: Seth is accessing prana, the life force, by staring directly into the sun to receive his nourishment. He started at 30 seconds and has worked his way up to a water. He’s living off Vitamin Water, sun, air, support from UYD listeners, breastmilk, fruit-flavored Chiclets and moms. His energy and clarity is on point, but he does have some sun haters saying he’s going to go blind. Seth: “Hey doctor, if you want to call yourself that … Just like the doctors that told my wife not to get breast implants. Thanks, dummy.”

Episode 085

36:51 – Shy Eater: Seth has the inability to eat/consume food in public places, certainly interpersonal places like eating with family or friends. He eats behind closed doors, binging and purging like crazy

Episode 086

54:48 – Hard of Hearer: Seth has trouble hearing and is going deaf. This is the hot new sensory malfunction of the season. Jah has had to supply Seth with a really loud pair of headphones and Seth has been TALKING LOUDER because he has to hear the vibrations

Episode 094

53:39 – Jah: “What’s your ailment this week?” Seth: “Fuckin’ life.”

Episode 105

27:55 – Stressorexia: Afflicting thousands of women overwhelmed trying to deal with work, motherhood, being wives, friends and just being themselves. In a quest for perfection, they skip meals – either they don’t have time or they’ve lost their appetite

Episode 109

35:57 – Drunkorexia: Young women spend all their daily calorie intake boozin’ it

Episode 111

37:13 – Nomophobia: Fear of being out of mobile phone contact

Episode 121

44:49 – Recession Depression: Jah is down in the dumps about the cutbacks that the country is going through. Causes emotional, mental, spiritual, physical and psychological damage

Episode 122

43:53 – Water lips: caused by women drinking out of sports bottles with small openings, causing wrinkles around the mouth area. Jah also mentions the “new” sensory malfunction called Hard of Hearing, but Seth already had this in Episode 086, 54:48

Episode 124

54:56 – BIID (Body Integrity Identity Disorder) – a rare diagnosis characterized by a relentless desire to amputate one’s healthy limbs

Episode 125

43:46 – Truman Show Delusion – afflicts white men 25-35, causes them to believe that the world is a giant docuseries about them

45:12 – Seth brings up Capgras delusion (originally mentioned in Episode 035, 45:42), where family members are mistaken for stand-in doubles

46:16 – Fregoli Delusion – one thinks various people they meet throughout their life are the same person but are done up in various disguises

Episode 129

23:01 – Alfred’s dad suffered from Restless Leg Syndrome, which keeps you up because you can feel your legs going nuts. He once made a sandwich and put the car keys in the sandwich and took a bite

23:45 – Seth gets itchy forearm, as does Jonathan. Seth drank so much coffee the other night and polished it off with a Diet Sunkist that his forearm was doing crazy things

25:22 – Seth was watching a Medical Mysteries show that talked about half the people who surf over the age of 30 end up being fully paralyzed

Episode 130

25:51 – New affliction affecting teens and tweens throughout the nation is guitarthritis, a pain/soreness in the wrist as a result of playing Guitar Hero or Rock Band

Episode 131

20:34 – Appafilia: comes from an uncontrollable urge to download mobile phone apps. iPhone users are buying them in droves. Apple took down their “I Am Rich” application, a large glowing gem that cost $1,000 and alerted everyone to how rich you are.

33:10 – Munchausen at Work syndrome: people cause problems at work so that they can solve them as fake heroes

Episode 133

59:39 – 20/20 has a special on Orthorexia (Episode 044, 36:42), an eating disorder characterized by excessive focus on eating healthy foods. There was one guy, Johnny, who weighed 76 pounds

Episode 136

13:00 – Sudden Loss Syndrome or wealth counseling – Outside of Nashville there’s a live-in facility called On Site, which is a treatment center that deals with money disorders, poor management and out-of-control spending. It’s called Money Rehab

Episode 137

42:27 – Mobile Phone Dermatitis: Rashes appearing on cell phone users ears and cheeks due to allergic reactions from the nickel on the phone’s surface. It can also occur on the user’s fingertips due to numerous texting

Episode 143

20:09 – Jonathan brings up “Wrap Rage” again (first mentioned in Episode 009, 44:34), extreme anger caused by product packaging that is difficult to open or manipulate. Amazon has committed to making all of its packaging for the holidays less impossible to open. 6,000 people go to the ER every year trying to open packaged goods, according to Consumer Products magazine.

Episode 154

54:08 – Climate Change Delusion – extreme anxiety in one’s psyche about the possible pending calamities of environmental meltdown. Abject fear and terror of all that will come from global warming

Episode 159

32:03 – Textual harassment is an issue affecting young teenage girls today. Teenage boys and young men have been inundating the girls with nonstop texts including sexual advances, etc.

Episode 168

12:42 – At last week’s meeting of the American Psychiatric Association in San Francisco, a very enthusiastic audience discussed the newest mental illness that’s sweeping the streets: PTED (Post Traumatic Embitterment Disorder) – people who feel they have been wronged by someone and they have been so wronged that they are entirely consumed with bitterness. They steep and stew in their bitterness.

Episode 169

53:06 – Cell Phone Elbow – the constant bending of the elbow from cell phone use blocks blood flow to the fingers and hands, causing nerve damage and permanent damage. Jah doesn’t talk on the phone as much as he texts, so he won’t have to worry about this affliction as much as he will Cold Stone Forearms (Episode 072, 30:21).

Episode 177

49:59 – Jah has had ticks before; he’s had more than one on his body at different points in his life (Episode 019, 13:20). With ticks in the summer comes Lyme Disease, which can be easily avoided but can happen. If you get Lyme Disease, you can get Lyme Rage – which is when the disease directly affects the neurological system and changes your mood personality.

Episode 199

2:05 – Seth thinks McDonald’s brings back the McRib during certain seasons to counteract Seasonal Affective Disorder (Episode 019, 36:41).

Episode 201

1:25 – Seth has Seasonal Affective Disorder (Episode 019, 36:41; Episode 199, 2:05) and the Na’vi Blues

Episode 206

14:31 – Marcia brings up Intermittent Explosive Disorder, or IED (Episode 018, 13:29) – a behavioral disorder characterized by extreme expressions of anger often to the point of uncontrollable rage that is disproportionate to the situation at hand. Marcia says she’s experienced this from Seth before, but Seth says Jonathan has it – there’s a 92-year-old WWII vet on Sepulveda Pass that can verify he has that (Episode 063, 47:47).

35:31 – Yuppie Mouth – because kids only drink bottled water, they’re having dental issues because of a lack of fluoride. Marcia thinks this is going to happen to Seth because of all the Dasani he drinks.

Episode 216

46:06 – Tinnitis – a constant ringing or buzzing in your ears

Episode 217

59:51 – FFI, or Fatal Familial Insomia – a rare inherited disease of the brain that can also develop spontaneously in people with an inherited mutation in their thalmus gland. The average age is about 50. Death occurs between 7 months and 3 years from the onset. The disease has four stages – 1) Patient suffers increased insomia resulting in panic attacks or paranoia; 2) Five months of heavy hallucinations, 3) Complete inability to sleep at all accompanied by 3 months of rapid weight loss, 4) After 6 months the patient becomes mute and have total dymentia and die.

Episode 222

27:05 – Phantom Recall Syndrome is when you’re convinced that products have been recalled when they haven’t and you go to every store scouring through products.

Episode 224

4:59 – After a long work day spent staring at computer screens, many people relax at home by staring at another computer screen. Eyes begin to feel achy and tired, images begin to blur, eyes dry out and get bloodshot because you’re blinking about a third as much. You may be suffering from something called computer vision syndrome.

23:27 – The New York Times wrote an article about hallucinations in the hospital. It’s an unusual phenomenon known as hospital delirium. It can be triggered by medicine, infections, surgery, the stay in the hospital itself. It affects one-third of patients over the age of 70 in hospitals all across the United States. Doctors described it as “sheer terror … basically your worst nightmare.” They featured an interview with a Pulitzer Prize-winning historian who has written biographies on Mark Twain and Walt Whitman who had a razor-sharp mind when he entered the hospital. He described his delirium as “thousands of tiny little creatures – despodic aliens, some on horseback, carrying weapons like some grand Renaissance battle. … Their leader, a woman with no mouth but a very precisely cut hole in her throat.” He hit his nurse, ripped tubes out of his arm, was covered in his own blood and crawling on the floor and tried to kill his own wife and daughter.

Episode 243

5:54 – Seth thinks Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) will kick in during Daylight Saving Time when it’s pitch black at 6 p.m. (Episode 019, 36:41)

Episode 261

36:40 – CVS (Chronic Vomiting Syndrome) is completely untreatable and you’re constantly vomiting. You have no other symptoms and you’re fine after it stops, but then it just ramps back up.

Episode 272

28:50 – Empty Oprah Syndrome – what people get when they have withdrawals from Oprah’s show not being on anymore.

56:02 – They complain of mysterious, creepy symptoms – bugs, or some other type of infestation crawling beneath their skin, sometimes burrowing to the surface and leaving odd specks and colored filaments in their wake. They have flocked to websites to share details of their malady, which they call “Morgellan’s Disease.” (Episode 026, 4:44). They have charged the medical community with ignoring their plight and have strong-armed the government into studying it. They go from doctor to doctor, carrying specimens in Zip-loc bags and on glass slides, desperate to find a physical cause. Now, a Mayo Clinic study reviewing samples provided by 108 such patients published Monday in the Archives of Dermatology, has concluded that the perceived infestation exists only in their minds. The authors concluded the rashes, eruptions and skin lacerations the patients have suffered were either mundane skin conditions that gave rise to delusions of skin infestations, or the result of the sufferers scratching or picking at their skin in order to make the delusion go away. The fibers and filaments so often described and offered as evidence of the infestation, were upon microscopic examination skin flakes, scabs, hair, lint, textile fibers and every-day debris.

Episode 277

45:32 – Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) (Episode 019, 36:41; Episode 199, 2:05; Episode 201, 1:25) was bad, but this summer we have to be aware of Summer Seasonal Affective Disorder (SSAD).

Episode 281

1:16:23 – Decompression Sickness describes a condition arising from dissolved gases coming out of solution into bubbles inside the body on depressurization. DCS most commonly refers to a specific type of scuba diving hazard but may be experienced in other depressurization events such as caission working and also in spacecraft extravehicular activity.

Episode 282

24:12 – Bleachorexia – primarily affecting women, this is the addiction to teeth whitening toothpastes, trays, strips, strange lights at the malls, etc. Anything that involves bleaching of the teeth.

Episode 288

2:57 – Seth has had many ailments, but he doesn’t think he’s had misophonia until now. Misophonia is a form of decreased sound tolerance. The slight arbitrary noises of a day can drive him into a crippling anxiety or furious rage.

Episode 289

14:21 – Seth realized that although his misophonia (Episode 288, 2:57), which was very intense and caused him deep rage and anxiety, has left his system. He was re-diagnosed properly by a computer, which indicated he had Superior canal dehiscence, or SCD Syndrome. It’s a disorder of the inner ear that causes every sound within his body – his heartbeat, eye movements, creaking old bones – to be loudly, sonicly amplified.

Episode 303

3:56 – Middle-aged men in their 40s and 50s are being chased by so many single women since they far outnumber the ladies that they’re suffering from Hotness Delusion Syndrome.

Episode 308

55:47 – Cold urticaria – you can develop a release of chemicals called histamines. You go out into cold weather and red itchy hives arrive minutes after exposure. Swollen hands after holding a cold beverage. Swollen lips while eating cold foods.

57:56 – Jah thinks he has adult onset diabetes from all the sugar he drinks. He’s thinking about keeping a food blog so he can monitor his caloric intake.

Episode 309

42:17 – If Seth wakes up in the morning with the headache, he wants to know if he had a stroke in the middle of the night.

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