View Who's Mommin' Harder
46:11 – (called “Who’s a Worse Parent?”) A) Mom smoking herb next to 11-day-old baby; B) Dad in Tulsa strip club leaves 4-year-old in car, boy wanders into club
30:46 – (called “Who’s the Worse Mom?”) A) NC mom arrested, except kids thought she was daddy – called mom’s girlfriend “mommy”; B) FL mom accepts $600 to let neighbor rape her 7-year-old son again
31:08 – (“Who’s the Worst Floridian Mom?” combined with TWIF) A) Pensacola woman locks disabled 27-year-old son into mobile home with no food, water, electricity for 16 days; B) Mom gives birth to two babies 7 months apart, throws second baby into trash
2:35 – (“Who’s the Best Mom?”) A) Mom kills baby after contaminating baby with cocaine in her breastmilk; B) Mom gives child coke after kid bugs her about it, kid has full cardiac seizure
19:25 – (“Who’s the Worse Teacher?”) A) 29-year-old teacher asks principal to take girl to prom, principal later finds out he’s dating the girl; B) HS teacher asks students to perform writing assignment: “Who Would You Kill and How Would You Do It?”
7:43 – (“Who’s the Greatest Mother?”) A) WI mother nursing her baby drunk, passed out and smothered her baby; B) CO mom hid baby behind entertainment center in family’s living room; C) Mom took 3-year-old baby to house party, baby gets hopped up on LSD
12:41 – Jonathan comes up with the official title off the cuff at 12:50 – “Who’s Mommin’ Harder?” A) Mom gives 2-year-old child morphine to get rid of cough; B) Mom gives 18-month-old daughter a bong hit
21:26 – A) Mom tries to trade 4-year-old son for wedding gown; B) Woman in argument with boyfriend, hits him repeatedly with head of 4-week-old baby. Jonathan’s reaction at finding out the age of the child that died: “Fuck you. Are you kidding me?” Seth: “What are you going to do? You’re throwing shit. The kid’s there. She’s in the moment.”
57:32 – Who’s Daddin’ Harder: A) Dad takes out hit on unborn baby; B) Philly newsstand owner threatens to rape anyone who objects to him selling pornography
45:27 – A) Mom throws child into oncoming traffic; B) Mom puts child into backpack and throws into river
31:27 – (“Who’s Makin’ It Work?”) – A) Woman angry at her boyfriend, gives him some drinks, then lights his balls on fire; B) Man shoots girlfriend in rectum
15:54 – (“Legal Guardian?”) – A) Woman at LAX puts 1-month-old grandson in plastic bin and sends through X-ray machine; B) Family at Toys ‘R’ Us splits up and rendevouz at home later – 3-month-old was left in cart crying at Toys ‘R’ Us; C) Four of woman’s infant daughters have toes gnawed off by pet ferret
44:33 – A) Dad leaves 3-year-old in locked van parked outside of adult bookstore for 45 minutes (“Hey, I have an addiction to these types of stores.”); B) Mom oblivious to 3-year-old in diapers walking along interstate: “Oh, he got out again?”
7:58 – A) Mom prepares contract with boyfriend and 15-year-old daughter – daughter must have sex with boyfriend two times a week for two months; B) Mom lets boyfriend have sex with 15-year-old because he wanted to; she joins in sometimes – shows up to court wearing “#1 Mom” t-shirt
11:44 – A) Georgia father sues Campbell soup after poisoning boy’s soup with Prozac and lighter fluid; B) Oregon father stuns 18-month-old son with 100,000-volt stun gun because he was crying too much
54:07 – A) Grandma puts knife to grandson’s throat; B) 84-year-old foster grandma screws 11-year-old grandson
5:58 – Best Principal of the Week? A) Tampa principal buys $20 worth of crack in his office and tries to smoke it there; B) Bethlehem PA principal buying and selling meth sitting naked and masturbating to gay porn in his office during arrest
7:51 – A) Colorado mom trades 5-month-old for down payment on a Dodge Intrepid and pocket money; B) Washington mom coaches kids from ages 4 and 8 to fake mental retardation and has collected social security benefits worth nearly $300,000
9:36 – A) Texas dad drunk on ATV, takes 9-month-old for ride, loses control, kid eats pavement; B) Drunk Virginia dad lets 14-year-old son drive car, goes off road, hits tree, teen ejected from car 10:58 (Craziest dude) – A) Boyfriend tries to suffocate and choke girlfriend, then jab with cordless phone and shove explosives in her mouth, then tells her to go get him breakfast; B) Dude dumps dog by school, but teacher and animal control officer catch man screwing the dog – get in fistfight
8:18 – A) Mom sends daughter and friend in store to shoplift, then ditches them when the cops show up; B) Mom in Tennessee visits classroom, points cap gun at students and pulls trigger several times day after VT shootings
11:55 (Who’s Drinking Harder? or Who Drinks Better?) A) Man fails breathalyzer in court – blows .24; B) Former cop arrested for suspected DUI, then arrested next day after blowing .47 – new Washington state record
55:42 – A) Arlington TX mom puts popsicle on 2-year-old’s head after he takes an 8-foot header off the stairwell – baby dies … Jonathan says that the kid shouldn’t die in “Who’s Mommin’ Harder?” because he gets a lot of submissions like that and it bums him out
42:56 – Jah: “I get so hopeful at the beginning of every week that you’re going to have a ‘Who’s Mommin’ Harder?’ for me that I’m even afraid to ask.” A) Mom passing blunt to child; B) Mom using child as a taser shield
40:56 – (Who’s Teachin’ Harder?) – A) Wisconsin middle school teacher suspended b/c she used the phrase “catch a nigger by his toe” in eenie meenie miney moe; B) Georgia fourth-grade substitute speaks jibberish and then strips down from waist down and lays down on her side
2:51 – (Who’s Crushin’ Harder?) – A) Arthur Price of Bellevue, Ohio, bones down with his patio table by putting his prick in the hole where the umbrella goes; B) Cody Allen Cox of St. George, Utah, is burning various household items in the middle of the street when police officer Rich Triplett arrives on the scene and the following conversation takes place: Triplett: What are you doing. Cox: I’m starting a movement. Triplett: What’s the movement about? Cox: It’s for what I believe in. Triplett: What do you believe in? Cox: Mary Kate and Ashley Olson and Toby Keith. Triplett: Did you take or ingest any kind of chemicals? Cox: One glass of wine and an energy drink.
9:51 – (Who’s Crushin’ Harder?) – A) 47-year-old principal from Illinois is caught, lying in bed in his underwear, watching porn and smoking herb with a 16-year-old girl and 15-year-old sister in a Wisconsin Super 8 Motel; B) 31-year-old Marlos Hernandez of Boulder, Colo., is arrested after bum rushing a memorial service for a girl that passed away in an apartment complex. He was first seen comforting the teenage sister of the dead girl by grabbing her breast, then on his way out took out his cell phone and showed pornographic pictures to the mother, then got in a bloody fistfight in the courtyard with the dude who tried to escort him out
34:12 – (Who’s Parenting Harder?) – A) Suburban Chicago man locked his 2 young daughters in a wire cage in the back of his pickup truck because he didn’t have a babysitter. He didn’t want them to run away; B) Lake Worth, Fla., woman balanced her 3-year-old on the roof of her Lexus and drove around a grocery store parking lot. Woman said she was just giving the child some fresh air and letting her have some fun; C) Spring Hill, Fla., boy asks his dad how to party right. Dad shows him to cut up oxy and then snort them. Kid died that night.
3:20 – (Who’s Living Harder/Who’s Keeping It More Real?) – A) Ken Hawkins in Ohio has been posing as an underwear researcher, saying he’s conducting market research and having people’s kids try on storebought underwear while he took copious notes to check the waistband, etc. He then gave the parents a $20 bill and went about his business; B) Barry Zephyr in Sioux Falls, S.D. came out of a local strip club, lying on a patch of grass bottomless, furiously masturbating. He was in a full boner rage, dropped his pants and began furiously jacking it
2:41 – (Who Brings Their A Game?) – A) 36-year-old NYC police dispatcher was arrested at a mall after going to meet a 14-year-old girl he met online. His screenname: DirtyOldIra. His quote that sealed the deal: “14 is the new 18.”; B) A Parkland, Washington man pulls up to a Java Girls (Hooters-esque Starbucks) wearing just a white bra and white panties with his dick in his hand. He drives away, comes back 15 minutes later completely bottomless with a pair of pink panties over his head with a hole cut out for the eyes, drives away. Comes back a third time totally naked, girl opens up the window and throws scalding hot water on his face and chest. He looks up to her, “Ohh yeah.”; C) Patrick Booger Red Kelly, 41, from Tyler, TX, has started a “kindergarten” where groups of children ages 5-10 learn to have sex with each other, then perform for a paying adult audience. He’s charged with giving the kids vicodin-like pills he called “silly pills” to help them perform
44:56 – (Who’s Parenting Harder?) – A) Woman in a Kentucky state fair pulls a bottle of wine out of her bag, pours it in the baby’s bottle and lets the kid start drinking out of it; B) Former Minnesota Viking player Darian Scott receives a 2-year sentence for putting a plastic dry cleaning bag over his son’s head to show him there was nothing to fear
38:36 – (Who’s Being Better?) – A) 19-year-old Evan David Thomas Adams is standing outside of Jeep Cherokee in Marion County, Ga., at 3 a.m., when a cop rolls up, and Adams jumps through the passenger window and attacks him. As they struggle out of the car, the cop opens the back door for the canine unit, which demolishes him. When cop asks ‘What’s the matter with you?,’ dude replies “I’m high on mushrooms dude.”; B) Fausino Diaz Hernandez of Bonito Springs, Fla., solicits sex from an undercover female prostitute, then bargains with her to give a broken 10-speed bicycle, a used lighter and 2 pennies.
28:09 – (Who’s Living Their Life?) – A) Ocala, Fla., Man tells girlfriend to enter the “Hot Body Contest” at the bar they were drinking at. When she did, he punched her in the face; B) Salt Lake City, Utah, two dudes get into a shoving match, one starts stabbing the other, dude getting stabbed pays the stabber $30 to stop stabbing him and the stabber leave. … Jah wonders which one in Choice B he is determining the winner, and assumes it’s got to be the stabbee.
56:08 – A) A father at a Fond du Lac County Fair walks up to concession stand with 4-year-old son and asks for a couple beers, then gives one of the beers to the 4-year-old. The 4-year-old’s 2-year-old brother came over and split the beer with his older bro; B) 15-year-old kid in Iowa is having a relationship with another 15-year-old classmate, and gets a text message from her breaking up with him. He gets a text the next day about a possible new girlfriend, who is his ex’s 37-year-old mother. He rolls by, bones down with her, then his mother finds some of the texts and photos and busts it up
41:53 – (Combined with “This Week In Florida”) A) In Jacksonville, on Craig’s List, a girl offered up herself to get pregnant. She then wanted to abort the baby in order to show her sister how easy it is to get an abortion because she won’t get one; B) Seventh grade social studies teacher Greg Howard was suspended from his school district after writing this on his dry erase board during class: CHANGE = COME HELP A NIGGER GET ELECTED.
58:17 – Quick shout-out to the name of the segment
54:37 – (“A Couple People And What They’re Up To”) A) Lincoln, Neb., resident Michael Dale Riley, 29, ran a stop sign and was pulled over. When the police opened up the driver’s side door, a small bag of cocaine fell on the ground. He was taken down to the jail and found with a baggie of coke in his butt and tries to eat it; B) Loganville, Ga., 40-year-old Christopher Childers was sitting in a Wal-Mart parking lot when he sees two 19-year-old Hooters waitresses get out of their car and go in to shop. He hides in the back of their car and waits for them. They see him, open the back door and slam his leg in the door, and the police and paramedics come. He says he had a very conservative girlfriend and they “looked easy.”
25:21 – Jah says that what isn’t a good thing to do is going onto Weck’s Wiki and reading through all the Who’s Mommin’ Harder? segments they’ve gone through. The one that got him the worst was the woman who let her next-door neighbor fuck her son again for $600 (Episode 008, 30:46).
51:44 – A) 31-year-old Summer ManyWhiteHorses was watching TV in the next room when her 2-year-old son fell from his high chair and died. She then wrapped his body in a blanket, put it in the trunk, told her 11-year-old daughter to get in the front seat and spent the next two months driving around Montana and using the government checks she received for the boy being autistic to buy food, alcohol and gas and stay in motels; B) 23-year-old Emily Beth McDonald in Austin had a 3-year-old daughter, Dakota, who was being admitted to hospitals for strange infections. A surveillance photo in the children’s hospital room caught her putting shit into her daugther’s intravenous feeding tube (Münchhausen Syndrome By Proxy).
56:06 – (“Who’s Lawsuitin’ Harder?”) A) Alfred G. Rava, who specializes in male anti-discrimination lawsuits, has sued Club Med for a ladies-only promotion, bars and nightclubs for ladies night discounts and the Anaheim Angels baseball team for giving away $1 tote bags just to women during a Mother’s Day baseball game in 2005. On May 8, 2004, the Oakland A’s baseball team had a Mother’s Day promotion with a Fight Breast Cancer 5K run before the game, free mammograms for women, etc. The first 7,500 women through the gate got a floppy sun hat to shield UV rays. Rava sued, and just won – they settled for $500,000. For men who can prove they were at the game, they get $50 in cash, a $25 Macy’s coupon and a pair of tickets to a future game. One of the dude’s own mothers died of breast cancer; B) Last month, Kentucky Fried Chicken promoted a giveaway of 2 pieces of grilled chicken, 2 individual side dishes and a biscuit on the Oprah Winfrey Show. Demand was so high that they had to scale back the offer and ask customers who had printed the online coupons to visit stores and get an IOU voucher and a free Pepsi. James Asanuma and Veronica Mora have filed suit against KFC and Yum Brands in a Los Angeles court and are seeking class action status. They’re accusing KFC of false advertising, fraud and unfair business practices. The company used the promotion to pluck money from customers who hadn’t intended to go to KFC and spend any, and made them use their color printer and download a program to print it, etc.
35:00 – Jah loves Uhh Yeah Dude, Seth, the website and the forums, however he doesn’t see everything on the forums. His mom reads more on the forums than Jah does, and is kind of a lurker because she doesn’t post all that often. Jah did not know that people had started regaling UYD with crazy stories of how their own moms are momming harder. Seth was a latch key kid and Jah was a lucky motherfucker. Seth’s mom still says things to Seth, asking him if she did a good enough job raising him. Seth said one of the coolest things his mom did for him is he threw a rock through a school bus window, admitted it to her and she told Seth’s principal he didn’t do it. She is en route to visit Seth right now.
46:02 – (Who’s Weirding Harder?) A) In 1996, in Portland, Maine, 44-year-old Angelo Vacca Jr. hit an elderly woman on Congress St. after she’d left church. He fled the scene but was later caught by police, telling them he’d panicked. He was only charged with Leaving the Scene of an Accident. This week, 57-year-old Vacca was hit by a car on the same street and killed. The crash remains under investigation; B) Shannon Broome, 15, was in a terrible accident this summer on Interstate 295 in Jacksonville. 4 of her friends were killed and she was ejected from the vehicle. She was home recuperating. This week a 19-year-old was texting while driving a little past midnight in his SUV, looking down at his phone, crashed through her fence, front yard, house and hits her in her bed in her bedroom. He pinned her against the wall, rebreaks the same shattered leg that had finally healed from this summer, broke her pelvis, all of her ribs and both of her wrists.
40:51 – Seth gives us two moms, one living in New York and one in Texas. The mom in NY is 68. She was in a family restaurant with her 43-year-old son. He’s handicapped. He began choking on his food. Restaurant patrons said the woman was repeatedly yelling “Let him die! Let him die!” as people were fighting to save him. … In Texas, a 24-year-old mother was arrested for making her 6-year-old daughter make video recordings of her have sex with multiple partners at the same time. … Jah rules that the Texas mom is mommin’ harder.
44:26 (“Who’s Lawsuitin’ Harder?”) – April Bonjour lives in Northern California and describes it as having foreplay with her boyfriend while her son was asleep in another part of the house. He was using a dildo when it almost killed her. First she experienced pain then she saw blood. She got the thing from Pipedream Products. … Another woman, Coleen O’Neal, is suing Continental Airlines and is also suing United Airlines and Colgan Air – owned by Pinnacle Air – because that was the charter airline. She experienced turbulence on her 20-minute flight from Lubbock to Houston, and it forced her to believe she was going to die. She now suffers from PTSD and was going to try to get a job with FEMA but it requires so much air travel but she’s traveling from too much stress to do that.